Moms, Let Dad Lead

father and son
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OK, ladies, this one is for you. As Gen Xers, we’ve grown up to believe we can have and do it all. We learned if we just try hard enough or want it bad enough, we can accomplish anything. As young girls we were told to be assertive and independent, to show our power. And the young men? Well, they were trained to let us.

For example, when I had my son, I discovered I had a much easier time letting my husband be my husband than letting him be my son’s dad. As the mother, I spent the most time with our son and pretty much figured I knew what was best for him. I wanted things done my way, and I wasn’t afraid to tell my husband which way that was!

Even though “mom in charge” seems natural, I’ve learned by experience that the control we think we want is actually a conflict of interest. When it came to raising our three kids, I thought I knew best. But after a while, I resented my husband for not taking more of a stand and leaving all the work to me.

Have you ever felt that way?

I can’t tell you the number of times I prayed for my husband to be the spiritual leader of our home and interact with the kids more. Then one day as I prayed, I felt God saying, “Well, then step back. Stop trying to run the show.” And you know what? As I stepped back, my husband stepped up to the plate, and I’ve been thankful ever since.

Dads may do things differently than moms would, but different is OK. No, wait—different is exactly how God designed it!

Tricia Goyer has written more than 35 books, including both novels that delight and entertain readers and nonfiction titles that offer encouragement and hope. She has also published more than 500 articles in national publications such as Guideposts, Thriving Family, Proverbs 31, and HomeLife Magazine.

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