Here's the Deal, by Larry Tomczak

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Should Children Be Spanked?

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Decades ago I authored a book now titled, The Little Handbook of Loving Correction. It was formerly called, God, the Rod, and Your Child’s Bod. I changed it out of cultural sensitivity.

This subject is very personal to me because I actually had a family member bring totally false accusations against me regarding this issue! A church I cofounded over 37 years ago was embroiled in a lawsuit dealing with “abuse” and even though I departed the church 23 years ago, my name was “thrown in the hopper.”

Have you ever disciplined  a child by confining them to their room until they changed their attitude (“imprisonment”)? Did you ever instruct a child there would be no lunch until they completed all their chores (“food deprivation”)? How about spankings to correct ongoing, defiant behavior (“beatings and abuse”)?

Thankfully the judge dismissed the charges. They were blatantly false accusations. But episodes like this and current news reporting causes confusion among parents who are trying to be faithful in raising their children according to biblical standards.

Here’s the deal: Scripture tells us “the corrections of discipline are the way to life” (Prov.6:23, NIV). What we need is a clear biblical worldview on the subject of corporal punishment so both parent and child enjoy that result.

Realism Versus Idealism in Raising Kids

Raising children requires a realistic perspective on our inherited sinful nature and a rejection of the “inherent goodness of man.” Adam rebelled and all of us have ratified that rebellion because of our inherited sin nature.

We don’t have to teach children to be selfish, lie, hit their siblings, steal or pout when they don’t get their way. We do have to train them to learn to control themselves and do what is right in the sight of God and man.

Don’t you just love it when so-called marriage and parenting “experts” expound their views on TV in their world of Utopia? One gorgeous celebrity has been divorced four times and yet goes on the circuit to promote her new book on romance and happy marriage (No jiving!). Another couple who are living together with no children confidently share their “wisdom” philosophy about raising their future children by simply reasoning with them, calmly affirming them and consistently building up their self-esteem.

Yeah, right. Wait ’till they confront strong-willed little Grayson in all his glorious disobedience and defiance one day! This is why seasoned veterans chuckle at this idealism and understand bumper stickers reading: “Insanity is inherited. You get it from your children.”

Better to approach parenting God’s way and embrace the truth that appears on a plaque we had in our home: “It is better to build children than to repair men.”

If you permit a child to nurture destructive habits which they will one day be forced (with greater difficulty) to break, you are living beneath the revealed will of God concerning your role as a parent.

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