It is not easy to be single in America today. If you are a man, it can be exceedingly difficult to find a good woman to marry. If you are a woman, it is literally a miracle if you can find a good man to marry. So is it just our imaginations, or has the process of finding a mate become much more challenging in recent years? Well, it is a fact that fewer people are getting married these days.
For the first time in our history, there are more single adults in our country than married adults, and TIME magazine says that 25 percent of millennials will never get married even once in their entire lifetimes. And of course those who do get married are taking far longer to do so than previous generations. Just recently, I wrote about how the average American woman is getting married 7.0 years later than she did in 1956, and the average American man is getting married 6.7 years later than he did back at that time.
So why is this happening?
Why has finding love become so challenging?
Below, I would like to share eight reasons why it has become so hard to find someone decent to marry.
1. The Me-Centered Society
We live in a "me-centered" society in which tens of millions of us are literally in love with ourselves. When pleasing self becomes the highest priority, that doesn't leave a lot of room for the kind of self-sacrificial love that marriage requires. An astounding 24 billion "selfies" were uploaded to Google last year, and that says a whole lot about where we are at as a nation. So many of us are inclined to stay with our "partners" for only as long as they make us happy, and the instant that ends many of us wish to dispose of them. And that is a lot easier to do if you are "living together" instead of being legally married.
2. It Has Become Much More Difficult to Find Someone With Good Values
The moral collapse of America is something that I write about extensively. As a society, we have rejected the values of previous generations, and today most people generally do whatever they feel like doing. But this can become a major problem when you are looking for someone "who shares your values" to marry. According to the Pew Research Center, more than half of all Americans who belong to the "Silent Generation" attend religious services weekly, but less than 30 percent of all millennials do. With each passing generation, we have become less Christian, less "conservative," and less moral. Unfortunately for young single adults, these trends do not seem likely to change in a major way any time soon.
3. A Lot of Young Adults Are Obsessed With Money and Materialism
A lot of single people these days will not date someone unless that individual has "good prospects" for the future. In fact, one survey found that 75 percent of American women would not date an unemployed man. Of course it is entirely reasonable to want a spouse who will work hard, but many young people are taking their obsession with materialism to ridiculous extremes.
I want to share with you what is going on in China these days, but similar scenes are playing out all across the rest of the world as well.
Parents often provide their male children with a home or car to make them appear more attractive. Women are often encouraged to "marry up" and not to settle for anyone who can't provide material benefits.
A woman from the southwestern city of Chengdu rejected her boyfriend's flash mob proposal last December, when she saw the ring and thought the diamond was too small.
She later told a friend that the man had agreed to "buy me a diamond ring as large as one carat," Soho News reported.
It was reminiscent of a famous line from a 2010 Chinese dating show, when a contestant said, "I would rather cry in the back of a BMW than smile on the back of a bicycle."
4. A Lot of Young Men of Marriage Age Have Turned Into Bums
Have you noticed that a lot of young men in their 20s and 30s would rather spend all day watching television and playing video games than doing something constructive?
And record numbers of them have moved back home with no apparent intention of moving out. Today, 32 percent of all American Millennials are living at home with Mommy and Daddy. In some cases, this is being done out of necessity because there aren't enough good jobs, but in other cases, it is simply pure laziness.
So what are quality young women supposed to do?
Are they supposed to actually consider these unambitious young men who seem perfectly content to indefinitely camp out in the basements of the homes they were raised in?
5. Sexual Immorality Is Absolutely Rampant
If you are looking for someone sexually pure to get married to, good luck with that. Everywhere you look in our sexually hypercharged society, people are behaving like animals.
This is even happening in the wealthiest areas of our nation. The following is an excerpt from a recent Vanity Fair article about what is going on in the Hamptons right now:
Cops put the kibosh on a burlesque party at East Hampton's Maidstone hotel. A professional orgy-planning outfit is hosting its first bacchanal later in June. Wednesday Martin, the author of Primates of Park Avenue, warns that married, heterosexual women in the Hamptons are conducting steamy affairs with their female fitness instructors. "Female flexuality," she calls it. A ... rabbi, who blazed through five ex-wives, finally got the ax after running around town with a former flight attendant who was decades his junior. And a Southampton schools superintendent was investigated after one of his X-rated selfies made the rounds on campus.
The CDC says that there are 20 million new STD cases in America each year, and our young people are being corrupted at younger and younger ages. In fact, I just came across a headline earlier today about a "sexy school teacher" who got pregnant by a 13-year-old boy.
The Aldine Independent School District Middle School teacher accused of having a sexual relationship with a 13-year-old student turned herself in to Montgomery County police Wednesday after a warrant was issued for her arrest.
Prosecutors said Alexandria Vera had a sexual relationship with one of her students and also got pregnant by the eighth-grader.
6. An Increasing Percentage of Our Young People Don't Even Want Someone of the Opposite Sex
According to the Daily Mail, the percentage of men and the percentage of women who have had sexual relations with a member of the same sex has approximately doubled since 1990.
Researchers from San Diego State University, Florida Atlantic University and Widener University in Pennsylvania, analysed data from the General Social Survey – a nationally representative survey of more than 30,000 adults that has asked Americans about their attitudes toward same-sex sexual behaviour since 1973 and about sexual partners since 1989.
They found that between 1990 and 2014, the percentage of men who reported having had sex with at least one man increased from 4.5 percent to 8.2 percent.
In the same time-frame, the number of women reporting having had sex with at least one woman increased from 3.6 percent to 8.7 percent.
7. Sexual Immorality Is Running Rampant Even in the Church
Did you know that the rate of teen pregnancy is about the same for Christians in America as it is for society as a whole?
Very few of our churches like to talk about sin, commandments, holiness or eternal judgment anymore, and as a result, many people in the church are going just as wild as people in the world.
Let me share with you one example that comes from an article authored by Dr. Michael Brown.
Well, during an I Love New York celebration at a recent women's conference hosted by Hillsong in New York City, a Hillsong youth pastor was onstage, dressed up as the Naked Cowboy, meaning that he too was wearing nothing but a cowboy hat, cowboy boots, briefs and a guitar.
But hey, after all, what's wrong with that? We don't want to get religious now, do we? What's wrong with a youth pastor standing onstage in his underwear during a women's conference? (Sarcasm fully intended.)
8. A Large Percentage of Our Young People Are Not Marriage Material Because They Are Addicts
You definitely do not want to marry an addict. In America today, millions of young people are addicted to alcohol, millions are addicted to illegal drugs, and millions are addicted to legal drugs.
But for this piece, I want to talk about pornography addiction in particular. As I have mentioned before, there are more than 4 million adult websites on the Internet, and collectively they receive more traffic than Netflix, Amazon and Twitter combined.
According to a recent Charisma article, 68 percent of all Christian men watch pornography on a regular basis, so even if you go to church "to find a man," there is still a very good chance that you could be getting an addict.
And of course all of these sick images are resulting in an explosion of very bizarre "alternative lifestyles" in America including "puppy play," "ecosexuality" and "polyamory." Everything about sex, marriage and relationships is literally being turned upside down, and the United States will never be the same from this point forward.
Before I finish this article, I want to leave you with one final thought.
In May 1961, President John F. Kennedy announced that we would put men on the moon.
In May 2016, Barack Obama announced that we would put men in women's restrooms.
The very foundations of our society are being systematically destroyed, and yet very few people seem upset about this.
If we continue going down this path, is there any hope for the future of our nation?
Michael Snyder is a Republican candidate for Congress in Idaho's First Congressional District, and you can learn how you can get involved in the campaign on his official website. His new book entitled "Living A Life That Really Matters" is available in paperback and for the Kindle on Amazon.com.
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